The Skin Care Regimen That Changed My Life


Okay.First of all, I just have to say that while I'm sitting here uploading these photos my armpits are getting really sweaty and my stomach is hurting a little because I've spent half of my life obsessively trying to hide this part of myself from the world.... and all of a sudden I got all … Continue reading The Skin Care Regimen That Changed My Life

Pairing Kid Snacks with Adult Beverages


Fun Fact about this Momb: I was born & raised in the beautiful city of Las Vegas! When I turned 19, I got a job working on The Strip & have been stuck in these golden handcuffs ever since. Today I am a server in a fine dining restaurant. This is certainly not my dream … Continue reading Pairing Kid Snacks with Adult Beverages

An Interview with The Toddler


"An Interview with The Toddler" Introducing the star of Ticking Time Momb: The Toddler! Meet Hendrix, the 3 year old turd bucket who is the inspirational force behind this blog!His favorite word is "poop," he loves to sing, & he is the sweetest, most silly guy I know!Have you ever interviewed your Toddler? I challenge … Continue reading An Interview with The Toddler

I Wish We Knew What Parenthood Would Do To Us


I wish we knew. I wish we knew what we know now. I wish someone had warned us. I wish we could go back to that day we started trying to get pregnant. I wish we knew what parenthood would do to us. No one said how hard it would be on us. They all … Continue reading I Wish We Knew What Parenthood Would Do To Us

Today I cried.


Today I cried. I cried hard. I sat at top of the staircase, covered my face, & cried. When he saw me start to come down the stairs, The Toddler ran behind the recliner to hide. He knew he wasn't allowed to have the cereal but there it was spilled all over the kitchen counter … Continue reading Today I cried.

Bedtime with the Toddler


After 2 hours⏰, 4 books📚, 7 songs🎵, 17 escape attempts🏃‍♂️, 13 tuck-ins🛌, 3 sippy cup refills🍼, 4 meltdowns😭, 2 plea bargains🙏 & .3mL of Benadryl☠... The Toddler is now kicking the wall to the beat of "We Will Rock You" & I'm stuck working nursery security until the Benadryl knocks his ass out. So yeah … Continue reading Bedtime with the Toddler

Parasites Who Feed Off Brain Cells


I read somewhere that the best way to clean a microwave is to put 1/4 cup lemon juice & 1/2 cup water in a microwavable bowl for 5 minutes. Then you let it sit for 2 minutes so the lemony steam gets all up in the remains of the Chef Boyardee & Spaghetti O explosions. … Continue reading Parasites Who Feed Off Brain Cells