Toddlers are awkward.


Toddlers are experts in creating the most uncomfortable and awkward situations.

And Paw Patrol is sending misleading messages.

So, going to the grocery store used to be one of mine and the 2 year old’s favorite things to do together.

We would usually go towards the end of our day to burn some energy before bedtime…

…or when I start feeling guilty that all I’ve fed the poor kid is fruit snacks and cheese sticks all day.

The toddler would make conversation with every… single… person we saw. He would greet everyone with a confident “HI!” The grocery patrons ate it up.

But just like most toddlers do, he took something so good and MADE IT SO SO WRONG.

On our most recent outing, the toddler addresses every… single… person we see with a new greeting:

“HELP!!!”

I try and laugh it off… ask him to stop.

“STOP!!! HELP!!!”

*grocery patrons glare*

I tell him to please stop saying that.

“STOP!!! MAMA?!? HELP!!! HHEELLPPPP!!!!”

It’s 9:30PM on a Tuesday. I’m aimlessly wondering around Albertsons with a barefoot, mismatched, dirty child who happens to look just like his father and nothing like me.

There is no recovery from this.

I swear I’m going to wring the neck of that damn Ryder kid. “WHENEVER YOU’RE IN TROUBLE, JUST YELP FOR HELP!”

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Author: tickingtimemomb

Motherhood Exposed | Raw. Sarcastic. Witty. Brutally Honest.

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