All I wanted to do was sit on the couch and eat my bowl of cereal…


The moment the milk hits the cereal, Toddler craps his pants. Now I have to wrestle a poopy, smelly toddler because diaper changes are now “the end of the world.”

Set the cereal bowl on the end table… “BISKIT GET AWAY FROM MY FOOD!!!” The Chihuahua is standing on the end table eating my Captain Crunch.

Move cereal bowl.

I gather the necessities… lay a writhing, screaming Toddler on the floor and no sooner do I unzip the onesie, the other dog pukes on the carpet… 10 inches from Toddlers head.

Zip onesie back up. Gag at smell of raw poop diaper and fresh dog vomit.

Go get cleaning supplies… clean the vomit… I just wanted to eat my cereal…

What in the world is that smell?!

Oh right. Diaper.

Made it through the diaper change despite hair pulling and several kicks to the chest.

Take diaper to outside trash. Might as well take all these boxes too…

Now where did I leave my cereal?

I finally sit down, and take a bite of the soggy 30 minute old Captain Crunch only to inhale another stench. WTF IS IT NOW

Toddler is squatting and grunting in the corner.

Toddler crapped his pants again.

All I wanted to do was sit on the couch and eat my bowl of cereal…

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Author: tickingtimemomb

Motherhood Exposed | Raw. Sarcastic. Witty. Brutally Honest.

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